WHERE'S SARAH?

by Steve Young

The Lords of Loud are at the ready. Rush, Sean, Bill-O, Glenn, et al. They will be front and center to answer all the questions you have about Sarah Palin and they will explain in no uncertain detail (i.e. RNC talking points) how she has all the knowhow necessary to do a wiz-bang job of handling the vice-presidency. And for that, I thank them. Because if they didn't, who would? Certainly not Sarah.

The RNC has gone into full Suppress-Sarah mode. No Sunday morning talk shows. No print interview with Time magazine. No talk to anyone who has an opportunity for a credible followup, like, "Governor, I know you wear lipstick, but that doesn't answer the question I asked."

That's right. The woman who would be Cheney-redux; the woman who is should be ready on day one to handle the second most powerful job on the planet and -- just in case -- prepared to take the over reigns from her boss, is not ready yet to answer questions from Tom Brokaw.

Then again, why do we need to ask her anything? She's already told you what Bush's speechwriter wrote she should tell you. And she was able to get it all out in a little over 30 minutes. And from that we now know what we need to know about her readiness. Right?

Now, that Obama guy. He's been on the stump for about a year and a half. Been interviewed umpteen hundred times. Whillikers, he's sat down with Bill O'Reilly. What I want to know is, why is he hiding from us? When will we find out who he is?

So, what's the difference?

Sarah Palin -- 30 minutes and one speech.

Barack Obama -- 18 months and searing media vetting.

Hmm.

Could it be that he's a guy and she's a gal?

Nah. Didn't keep them from pummeling Hillary.

Could it be that he was born outside the continental U.S. 48?

Nope. So was Sarah.

Hey. Wait a minute. I don't know if you noticed, but Sarah's white and Barack is (s/b whispered) black. I wonder... Nah, there's no racism to speak of in the country today. Is there?

Well, thank God for that.

At least we'll get to hear her answer questions during the Vice Presidential debate. I mean, if they'll let Sarah participate. I'm sure they will. After all, we already know she's got the dealing with the ferriners formula down pat:

Alaska + Proximity to Russia = Foreign Policy Chops.

And, while McCain nor Palin mentioned the issues in their speeches, Sarah certainly knows how to deal with education, job loss and healthcare.

Yep, I'm sure they'll let her show up...as long as they don't see this video.

Sh-h-h. Don't let 'em know. This is just getting to be fun.