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by Steve Young

Steve Young columns

There were two major stories this past week and the Lords of Loud were at their best covering both the nomination of Barack Obama and the Right's immediate need to tell us all why the selection of Sarah Palin as Republican VP nominee was a slam dunk, grand-slam, gold medal, perfect 10, hole-in-one, volley ball spike choice by McCain. But no other LoL network analyzed the story better than our friends at Fox:

BRIT HUME: Joining me now is our the Fox News all star panel. The question arises immediately of course, how is this speech? Did Obama seem like he thought he was a rock star or did he think he was Zeus preaching hope with a bolt of lightning held high above his head? Did the speech do what the convention organizers and the Obama campaign hoped it would? Bill Kristol, your thoughts?

BILL KRISTOL: I thought Obama's speech was a shockingly minimal endorsement of Obama.

HUME: Really?

KRISTOL: Other than the words and speaking style, this speech could have been given by anyone.

HUME: Including John Kennedy?

KRISTOL: Excluding the dead -- except for Lyndon Johnson. That bastard wouldn't let mortality stand in the way of stealing the limelight. The point I'm making is that Obama, who campaigned for eighteen months, never once mentioned that he was Obama. There were 75,000 people sitting there and millions more at home. There were a lot of people who had never met him, let alone seen him in person. That he felt that he didn't have to bring up that he was him just showed how condescending he is; how much of a celebrity he believes he is. How out of touch he is with everyday Americans who I speak to every day at my club.

HUME: Wow. You agree with that, Mort?

MORT KONDRACKE: I do. Look, he said what he had to say, but he didn't say anymore. Generally, he didn't give the specifics. He never said the things that I'm thinking he should have said, nor did he tell us how he would do to make the changes necessary to carry out what I want. And I don't know if you noticed, but not one mention of Ayers or Wright.

JUAN WILLIAMS: I really have to disagree, but not all that much.

CHARLES KRAUTHAMMER: Brit, if you don't mind I'm just going to sit here and let overt disdain and contempt for the human condition drip from the corner of my mouth.

BILL O'REILLY: While I have never been anything but completely fair to Senator Obama, I have to say, objectively, that the Folks know nothing about Obama except for this speech and since he didn't come on the Factor to deliver all I can say is the normal folks just aren't going to understand why this candidate didn't have the courage to come on with me to say the same thing he just said tonight, but to me.

CHRIS WALLACE: Gentleman. Obama won't be giving his speech for another five hours.

HUME: We'll be right back with Sean Hannity, Dick Morris and Karl Rove to analyze why Barack Obama was so ill-prepared to do make this speech earlier.

Then Fox's favorite bad boy, Newt Gingrich, jumped on the Hannity mike and in the Washington Post to opine on Sarah Bara's perfect viability:

"Gov. Sarah Palin is exactly the right choice for John McCain's running mate. The contrast with Sen. Joe Biden is extraordinary. Biden came to the Senate in 1973; Sarah Palin was 9. Biden has spent all those years in Washington; Sarah Palin spent them in the American West. She is for drilling for more American oil, and Biden is against more American oil. Every reformer and every Hillary Clinton supporter should take note -- they have an opportunity to reject a disappointing betrayal of their hopes and vote for real reform and real opportunity for women."

See how Newt breaks it down in simple terms that all Newties can understand?

Biden has been in the Senate 38 years. Palin spent her time in the American West. Not just the west, mind you. The American West. Not like that European Senate of Biden's in the American East where Newt served as Speaker.

"Palin is for drilling for more American oil, and Biden is against more American oil." Here's where we get to play "Find The Missing Words That Newt Forgot To Use To Explain What He Actually Meant." Oh, there they are. They were hidden in those sneaky parenthesis all the time.

Palin is for drilling for more American oil (in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge before we drill for oil in the places oil companies have already be give the right to drill). Biden is against more American oil (drilling in protected areas while he is whole hog for letting the oil companies drill where they've already have the right to drill but to this point have decided against it).

But here's what the feminism in Newt overflows with true understanding of women and why voters aligned themselves with Hillary.

"Every reformer and every Hillary Clinton supporter should take note -- they have an opportunity to reject a disappointing betrayal of their hopes and vote for real reform and real opportunity for women."

Oh, my. Did you throw up in your mouth, just a little?

Palin, who is for drilling in ANWR, said that "climate models that predict continued loss of sea ice, the main habitat of polar bears, during summers are unreliable," is against stem cell research, believes Creationism should to be taught in public schools, supported a constitutional amendment to bar health benefits for same-sex partners and wants Supreme Court judges who will overturn Roe vs Wade.

I can just see the deluge of anti-science, anti-woman's right to choose, anti-gay, anti-environmental Hillary supporters lining up for this one.

So, there it is. Laid out clearly by the Professor Gingrich.

Palin and Hillary: Couldn't tell them apart.

Steve Young is author of "Great Failures of the Extremely Successful" ( and blogs at

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Albion Monitor   August 30, 2008   (

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